We are all feeling it right now. Stress, anxiety, fear, confusion, grief are part of our daily lexicon and living experiences. Getting through the day is a heroic act. The kind of stress we are living with can be damaging- to our health, our relationships, our emotions, our brain’s capacity. My work and my life’s practices are designed to quell the stress monsters, and bring alignment and well-being back.

Here are 5 of the most exquisite (Yes, exquisite!) self care tools I can offer as ideas to find your beautiful center again. Pro self care tip- use words that make you feel yummy and titillated!

#1 Take a Deep Breath- Box Breathing

The Box Breathing Technique: Of all of the exquisite self care tools, this is the first go to. It is incredibly effective and fast acting. It is proven to work on our nervous systems, to get us back to a state of ease and calm. (More info on the nervous system in future blog posts!)

Step 1: Let go with an opening Exhale

Find a comfortable position for yourself. You may sit upright, or choose to lie down. Begin by slowly exhaling through your mouth, getting all the oxygen out of your lungs. I like to think of all of my stress emptying out along with this breath.

Step 2: Slowly Inhale

Inhale slowly and deeply through your nose to the slow count of four.

Feel the air fill your lungs, one section at a time, until your lungs are completely full and the air moves into your belly. I like to imagine inhaling ease, peace, love, or any other positive emotion or intention.

Step 3: Hold your breath

Hold your breath for your next slow count of four.

Step 4: Exhale again

Exhale through your mouth for the same slow count of four, expelling the air from your lungs and belly. It can be nice to make a hissing or sighing sound.

Be conscious of the feeling of the air leaving your lungs.

Step 5: Hold your breath again

At the bottom of that exhale, hold your breath for the same slow count of four.

Repeat the Box Breath for as many rounds as you can. I recommend starting with 4 complete rounds.

If you ever feel dizzy or out of sorts, return to your normal, natural breath, and try again another time. Be kind and gentle with yourself. It may take you a little time to get acquainted with how this technique works for you, or you may take right to it!

#2 Exquisite Body Love: Move your Body!

If you were to move your body exquisitely, how would that look for you? Different body moves can evoke different states of being, from very chill to uplifted and energized. One thing is for sure. Getting our internal systems flowing shifts our state from stress to “yesssss”. Our brains are stimulated, endorphins (feel good hormones) are produced, blood and lymph circulate to promote health in each organ system, sleep can re-calibrate, self confidence is boosted. Every facet of our lives and body systems can be affected by more regular movement- pick your favorite! And, create a regular routine!

Ideas for movement:

Slow, sensual movements, taking time to feel, to touch, to scan and/or stretch…..to enjoy all of you (to your favorite sultry song…here’s an idea!)

A power run, getting sweaty and completely out of your mind. Check this song!

An exquisite yoga class, matching your energy in the moment could be your go-to. There are so many classes online right now. Check out my YouTube page for options!

Or a good strong hilly walk or bike ride in your neighborhood, taking in the beauty you might miss when you’re driving by in your car. Get that heart pumping, and those senses stimulated! Take some beautiful photos along the way. A favorite song!

And, my favorite- DANCE PARTY for one (or more)! Move your body, shake, wiggle, giggle and let music take you into the moment. Commit to dancing to one to three songs- or more. Dance as if no one is watching, as they say. Ask me for my favorite dance playlist!

#3 Get Into Nature!

Nature- wild spaces and places- soul nourishing goodness. Taking the time to be in natural beauty, to slow down, to let all of your senses dance in the moment is without a doubt an exquisite self care experience. Find your favorite spots near or far. Beauty is everywhere- find and savor it!

Add the creative process of photography, drawing or painting in these spaces, and you are guaranteed to hold on to the felt sense of being in a treasured beautiful spot for a long time to come.

#4 Look at a Childhood Picture of Yourself- Self Compassion Work

How often do you see yourself as a being of pure love and light- a spark of perfection, despite your flaws, misdeeds, and mistakes? We are a society of harsh critics, and we tend to turn our most intense judgements on ourselves. This exquisite self care technique can be an emotional experience.

Find a photo of yourself when you were young. Now, take time- 10 minutes or more- to gaze at this photo. Notice what you see. There may be some emotions that arise. Keep them coming, but don’t dwell. Can you find the essence of this young being? Can you look past the physical body, past the circumstance of the photograph? Can you find your true self? Qualities that make you you….that lie beneath life’s burdens. This may take practice. After you have spent a little time with this young treasure, make some “I Am” statements. Some examples might be: “I Am Love”, “I Am Spunky”, “I Am Sensitive”, “I Am Adorable”…..

Now, remember…..this young being is YOU. Still. When your harsh critic shows up (stress monster), remember the feeling that seeing your inner essence brought to you. Keep that with you through the tough moments in life. And, see if you can imagine the inner essence, the young one, in everyone you encounter! Truly exquisite work.

#5 Cook Healthy Food

Go ahead. Get into the kitchen. Choose the most healthy foods- the ones with color and texture and flavor. Fruits and veggies, proteins and complex carbohydrates that will delight your senses and create body balance. The kind you know are good for you. Cook a meal that takes time to prepare, one that isn’t heavy, but satisfies. Follow a recipe, if you’d enjoy that. Or get wildly creative and improvise! Make this an event, an experience. Light a candle, put on some music. Stay in the moment. Enjoy the activity. Savor. Nourish. Create beauty. Pay attention to every bite. Don’t overeat. Take a moment to give thanks for the food, the experience, your body’s health. Gently digest. Ahhhhhhh….

Self Care in the worst of times is incredibly challenging. Yup. Be kind to yourself. These are just 5 ideas out of an ocean of them. If you can’t do something “big” today, find a micro moment of self care. Maybe it’s just a conscious breath, or feeling the softness of your clothing on your skin. Seeing beauty in a tiny detail. Bottom line- tune IN to your senses, get OUT of your self sabotaging thoughts. I wish you luck, ease, and a whole lot of love! Please reach out if you desire any kind of support. Also, feel free to share your favorite self care ideas!

I wish to add an addendum to this article. Something that occurred to me while writing this work, but didn’t think until now to include it. Some of these tips are offered to those of us who are privileged enough to have a certain amount of time or things in our lives (such as a device to read (and write!) this blog, or listen to music, access to an old photo of ourselves, access to healthy food). I wish to recognize that privilege, to name it, and to humbly offer this as an intention to create ease and possibility for self care to all people, regardless of access. May we create new paradigms and systems that remove barriers to self care for those less privileged and considered. May we engage in community care, looking out for and offering to, one another. May we move towards a great turning.

5 Exquisite Self Care Tools that will Save You in Times of Stress